Ditto the Beagle

Sadly, once again, I find myself writing about a natural disaster that must be impacting thousands of animals. Hurricane Katrina ripped through parts of the United States, leaving a trail of flooding and destruction. Right now all of the news stories are focused on the property destruction and loss of human life, but inevitably reports will start to come out about the animals that were left behind in the scurry to evacuate.

Please consider making a donation to the American Red Cross or the Humane Society of the United States.

Well, you’ve probably been wondering where I’ve been. It’s a sad story, really. Dad went away all last week and Mom refuses to let me use the computer. So, instead I got into all kinds of trouble. I’ve learned a new trick where I can take clothes underneath the bed and go right to he middle and neither Mom nor Dad can reach me. It infuriates them. I had at least half a dozen pieces of clothes under there last time I checked.

Dad came home and the morning after he came home something very bad happened. I had been sneezing a lot because my nose really was itching. I’d also been itching it with my paws a lot. Dad seemed to think something was wrong so they took me to the bad place. Then they LEFT ME at the bad place and the people there gave me a shot that made me go to sleep. When I woke up my nose was really sore and I was in a cage. I hated it. Fortunately, Mom and Dad came and got me pretty quickly and took me to the Cove where I could tell all my friends what happened. Snoopy couldn’t believe it.

But, it gets worse! When I got home from the Cove there were two NEW people there. They kind of looked like Mom so I didn’t bark at them a lot, but still didn’t like that they were there. Eventually I got so tired that I had no choice but to go to sleep with them sitting on MY couch. Take a look:

The only highlight of the night was that I got to eat this great new treat. It was like ice cream for dogs! Here is me taking it down:

This weekend I got to play at the parks a lot and also got a bath. It kind of stunk but I liked playing outside and getting dirty.

This week Mom and Dad said it’s going to be real busy because the crazy girl with the blonde hair is getting married. Why should that effect me?

Last night I made Dad REAL mad. I was playing with my good friend Monkey and for some reason all of Monkeys insides starting coming out. So, I was trying to eat all the fluffy white insides and Dad said it wasn’t good for me. But I am real smart so I would go under the bed and hide. Mom would try to get me from one side and Dad from the other, but I am small and they couldn’t reach.

Eventually I decided to come out for a goldfish cracker and as Dad was leading me away, he ran straight into the closet door in the hallway and broke it right off the track. It sure was funny. Well, I thought it was funny, anyway.

That’ll teach him to bother me!

Mom went away for the night to something called a “Bachelerotte Party” for that other blonde girl. I was real mad about it, but Dad and I still had a good time. We watched TV and went on a few walks and got to sleep in the huge bed all by ourselves! I had tons of room.

Lately I’ve decided to start destroying things when Mom and Dad leave me at home alone. Twice now I’ve pulled the garbage bag completely out of the can and tried to eat everything. Now we have a new garbage can that makes it impossible for me to get into. What’s up with that?

Today when Dad left me I pulled the Chick-fil-a calendar off the fridge and destroyed it! Dad took a picture of it:

Pretty neat, huh?

This morning I killed a spider and ate it. It was walking on the floor in the kitchen and it was bothering me. First I tried to push it outside, but it refused to obey, so then I ate it. It didn’t taste very good and made my throat itch, but I had to do what I had to do. I can’t have these other creatures invading my home.

It must be the time of year where everyone gets a puppy. First my new Cousin Willy and now Meri and Darby got a puppy Shi Tzu. It has no name yet, so I have decided to call it Choco. Nice, huh? Here is a picture:

My cousin Murphy got a brother this weekend! His name (I think) is Willy. He is a Golden Doodle. That’s 3/4 poodle and 1/4 Golden Retriever. Not pure, like me, but not too bad. He came home on Saturday and hasn’t gotten up the nerve to tear the house up, like I do. He’ll get braver everyday, though.

Here’s a picture of him:

Here are some pictures of me sleeping in my brand new bed! Pretty nifty, huh?

My new bed arrived! Well, I guess it’s technically not mine, but I get to sleep in it at night. It is HUGE. I don’t even know that Mom and Dad are there. Sometimes I like to step on them just to bother them, like last night when I stepped on mom’s face while she was sleeping. She got real mad.

Now I sleep in until 5:00 everyday. Dad seems happy about that. I’ll post a picture soon of me and my new bed.

Dad took this picture of me as I lay petrified at the doctor. Is this abuse or what?